Any situation that feels like a problem isn't what you think it is.  Impossible situations only appear to be impossible.  Perceived obstacles only exist as long as you decide they will.  Since you can develop abilities to get out of any situation, you can realize self-defeating beliefs are illusions.  How are you denying yourself the ability to participate more fully in your own life? What would this mean anyway?

Some people think illusions are limited to tricks that a magician will perform for an audience.  Now, think about this for a minute.  When the magician seems to cut a woman in a box in half or, seems to pull a rabbit out of a black top hat on a table, part of you realizes this guy is pulling a fast one over you.  You may laugh, but sense the magician has guarded secrets.  You may wonder, what's the truth?  How does he do it?  Ask yourself why you decide knowing one way or the other matters.

In other areas of life, most people are fond of the truth.  If someone lies to you and you figure this out, it hurts you inside.  You don't like it.  So, why would you react differently to what you tell yourself? Is it a question of intentionally overlooking the real feelings underneath a reaction? You are totally responsible for your experience. 

Resisting anything you anticipate will be painful can feel more painful than the experience would be.   What is the pain about? Think action- reaction.  Nothing that you interpet on any level has anything to do with external reality.  Are you indulgent enough to let yourself feel?  Just because you feel genuinely doesn't mean it comes from the real you.  Your ego may project it.  What is your awarness level and where would you like it to be?