When you get upset, lose focus or balance, pay attention to what your emotions are telling you. Stop giving credit to others for the way they seem to behave. The world around you only ever responds based on your expectations. Notice what happens when you are alone. Notice what agitates you, makes you feel impatient. Notice what happens as you separate yourself from source. You cannot be mad at someone or be afraid of anything and be true to yourself. Brace yourself: a conflict with anything is a conflict with yourself. So, what can you do about it?
1) Stop allowing yourself to be offended. Whatever offends you only weakens you. Being offended creates the same destructive energy as that which is used to press your emotional buttons in the first place. Monitor your thoughts and inner dialogue. Nothing irritates you unless you allow it. What to do? Stop resisting. Look deeper at the nature of your own suffering. It actually begins and ends with you. The real issue is a yen to control the uncontrollable.
2) Let go of your need to be right. You are conditioned to believe some people are right and others are wrong. If you allow yourself to get agitated, you are disconnected from your loving, creative spirit. Letting go of the need to be right helps you embrace kindness and gratitude for lessons at hand. Imagine yourself in another's shoes. Would you feel the same as you do in your own skin? Would you behave in the same way or see more than one 'right way'?
3) Give up the desire to win, compete or be superior. Whenever you get stirred up, and lose sight of inner peace, observe the ego. As you let go of the desire to be better than others, you recall a feeling of calmness. You begin to see all experience invites you to evolve within yourself, to see the nature of impermanence. Give up any unwholesome state of mind. Sadness, grief, fear, regret, and pity do not arise when you have true self-understanding. As you feel inner gentleness, you strengthen compassionate, wholesome states of mind. Love reigns. The heart knows all is always well, that everything is equal, that every situation is win-win for all.
4) Know its all unfolding in divine order. Whatever your role or stage in life, you attract the perfect conditions and people. See things from a higher vantage point. When people do not show up to assist you, then you have the skills, self-discipline and emotional intelligence to handle it on your own. Before you judge others, ask yourself how you would deal with the situation from their perspective. Only when you know the cause of suffering is that the end of suffering. You benefit others by nurturing a non-judging mind, and keeping an open heart.
5) Recognize you cannot separate wisdom from compassion. You know things as they truly are through your own direct experience. The more you grasp reasons for your emotions and your own suffering, the more you understand the suffering of others. You strengthen a more conscious connection with all beings. Be loving and kind toward yourself. Accept you are not who you think. Forgive yourself. Ask yourself questions and allow answers to emerge. Nothing fazes the essence of being. You can inspire people into a place of non-suffering by existing in this state. Be present. By direct inner seeing, you see what matters without study, logic or reason.
"You can't suffer yourself into their understanding. You have to succeed yourself into their success." -Esther Hicks