Crisis is opportunity

Any problem you perceive or experience, even the worst situations imaginable, actually contains the beginnings of the best possible things that could happen.  You can learn to reframe a crisis as an opportunity. Your point of view determines what seems easy or hard. What becomes far more important is whether you evolve to consider your pursuits to be more satisfying and fulfulling.

Consider entrepreneur Robert Kiyosaki went through a difficult period where bankruptcy initially forced him to live in his car with his wife for six months.  They readily admit that was the toughest period of their lives.  Yet, knowing hardship prompted them to develop new faith in themselves.  It encouraged them to trust their dreams. They swallowed their pride, asked for help, took friends up on an offer to l live in a basement and 9 months later, they were back on their feet. Kiyosaki recreates his version of success as a best-selling author, real estate investor and financial advisor.

Consider a young man had a burning desire to pursue a musical career but was repeatedly told he had no talent.  He came  to suffer from low self-confidence, and didn't initially see everything he labelled as a problem was really a self-created illusion.  He opted to become a pharmacist, but he never let go of his dream.  When new friends encouraged him to enter the 2006 Australian Idol contest, he never anticipated winning. Funny, now Damien Leith's native Ireland wants him back! Athought in the process of becoming an Australian citizen, he does not forget his roots.

Both these men come to see they couldn't get rid of their problems by getting angry or trying to understand how people felt around them.  Instead, they had to step back and see it is up to each of us to notice and correct errors in our own thinking.  Each of these men discover inner power to reframe conditions, to view all experiences as part of learning curves and view every perception is a stepping stone.  In essence, they show us perceived problems are exercises in character-building. 

One big message stands out:  to doubt and discourage is like standing in our own way.  Each of us is invited to appreciate all experience and accept ourselves as we are.  Though we create our own personal versions of external success, inner success is given.  Intrinsic worth is always here.

Twisted ideas of succes?

As you meet people in your life, you come to learn that they have different ideas of success.  It's useful to figure out what kind of success you desire for yourself and whether the people you know and hang around are assisting you to get closer to your target.  Statistics show that the five people you spend the most time with are those individuals whose lives you somehow admire and in whose footsteps you're most likely to follow. Consider the life choices of your closest friends. Reflect on where you are and where you aim to be.  Realize all choices have consequences.  Those of your friends may or may not be things you wish for yourself.

Down at the local bar, you may overhear a man bragging how he had evaded police when his blood alcohol level was over the legal limit. He felt he'd succeeded by pulling one over on them.

As you walk downtown with friends, you may hear a homeless man explain to another that he felt he'd succeeded because he refused to accept social or other assistance. After all, he had pride.

While out at a party, you may hear of a friend who is proud of taking illicit drugs and managing to stay perceived by friends and family as being clean. As he managed to hide a dangerous habit, he felt that he succeeded.

After an enjoyable dinner, you discern that a colleague has a serious gambling problem. This person admits playing the machines gives him an incredible high. He tells you his idea of success is having the goal of winning the slots to work toward. He invites you to join him for company.

You're out with your friends at night and they impulsively decide to graffiti the underside of an old bridge. They pull you to run after the stunt.  They laugh and feel they will get away with it.

One of your university alumni has retired and is charged up about his plans to sail across the Atlantic.  His track record as a sailor isn't great, and so he's looking for crew. He asks you to join him on the adventure.  He is convinced he will succeed if he leaves just before hurricane season.

One of your friends has been smoking cigarettes for years.  He learns he has contracted lung cancer. You still accept the second-hand smoke.  Part of his idea of success is not having been intimidated into quitting. He feels the government or anyone else shouldn't control his choices.

It's never too late to review your life choices and change how you spend your time. It's unlikely you'll agree with all of your friends' behavior. Remidn yourself you're not forced to follow anyone's footsteps.  Yet, you can learn much about your principles and values from the choices of people you call your friends.

As you take time to clarify dreams and the kind of life you would like for yourself, do not allow yourself to become discouraged by friends who haven't had courage or self-confidence to change.  If you hope to achieve financial success, then it wouldn't make sense to seek a mentor in someone who has not experienced the journey you aspire to for yourself.  If you're a creative person, pursuing a science degree or joining military may not be for you.  if you have athetic goals, then drinking or disregarding health will not help your body train and achieve.  Life choices offer you opportunities to learn about yourself. Take steps to define your own view of success.  Then, you'll discover how much easier it really is to go after it and live it.

Getting along

The little things you do often make a big difference to your relationships, your workplace and even to strangers. What kind of efforts do you make to get along with other people? Some of us do not like confrontations or discussing things that make us feel uncomfortable. People who learn the importance of listening and compromise know these behaviors go along way to make interaction more enjoyable and enduring. What efforts do you make to understand other people?

Consider;

a) what steps you can take to give more of yourself, your ear, and your time?

b) what can you learn about you from people's complaints? What would you like to change?

c) how can you give people in your life more space to deal with things alone?

d) how can you forgive other people for their mistakes so you can move forward?

e) why do you need  forgive yourself for things you've done? how do they affect relationships?

f) what can you do to boost morale, self-confidence and encourage others to excel?

g) What kinds of training might you undertake to better udnerstand shared finances or emotions?

Answering the above questions would be a great place to start.

Exert your best efforts

Wesley Harris wrote an insightful book caled "Success is in Giving." He believes that only as we learn to give do we learn to live.  Ever wonder why some people pursue happiness and other people seem to find it everywhere? Take a closer look at their behavior, and you'll understand.

Bill Wylie is one example.  Harris describes this Australian as a man who "has enjoyed outstanding success in rescuing ailing companies and in some cases, turning multi-million dollar losses into multi-million dollar profits."  This corporate success story demonstrates the impact of exerting one's best efforts.  You see, during childhood, Bill Wylie spent time in a Salvation Army Boy's home.  He moved on to take initiatives to deliver telegrams and newspapers to make a living. He left school at age 13, worked days and studied nights to earn qualifications. Later, he lost his first wife and son to tragic circumstances.   

Although observers may comment that Bill Wylie led a difficult life, he would say, "the harder I work, the luckier I get." His attitude and altrisum helped him raise millions of dollars for charity, including for the Salvation Army that helped him many years before.  Luck has little to do with it.

Contribute to new kinds of success

What is it about success that really gets you to feel motivated? How do you see it? What do you think about? We each have different ideas or plans that get us fired up.  It's vital to listen to what these examples of success are telling us about ourselves, our state of mind and feelings.   Then, you realize you have power to contribute to new kinds of success inside yourself and outside.

We see media images of community projects in the developing world, and this redefines a sense of success for people.  Organisations such as UNICEF, Foster Parent's Plan and others invite Westerners to sponsor children and families to help them obtain basic human needs such as clean water, constructive work and access to education. Foreign travel packages exist that enable Westerners to participate in projects such as building schools, shelters and assisting to implement infrastructure so communities can have access to conveniences we often take for granted.

As it happens, my community had schools so I didn't know what it was like to be brought up without one.  My neighbourhood has been on a local water system and so there's no need to locate underground water tanks and put those in. The area where I live has indoor plumbing so I don't focus on the need to put in a sewage system.  If we don't have something, we may not desire it if we don't know about it. Yet, if we know that some aspects of our modern lifestyle could assist others, it makes sense to let them know about it so they can decide if they want it.