Decoding trauma leads us to truth

Notice that Truth emerges out of trauma, even layers and layers of trauma as one finds unimaginable courage to to sift through it. This process is about exploring taboos and caverns within us that the mind has us believe are out of bounds, covered with no trespassing signs. Yet, being undeterred from what mind scares us into believing is "mischief" , non-conformity, even instills fear of death or God, is the yellow brick road in disguise, the ultimate path into the unknown that allows the wizard behind the curtain to reveal itself.

Turns out, truth is the unbearable knowledge we are taught to fear and avoid, what ego develops around to hide deeper realities. Truth leaves ego speechless, utterly crippled, unable to know how to relieve its agony as its very existence is threatened. It avoids "Truth" entirely by developing the imaginary level of consciousness. This is where we create an idea of false self that is tolerable and can allow ego to manage the unbearable reality it has to face. It also creates familliar physical senses to ensure the real does not erupt in the face. So, unbearble familliar knowledge becomes repressed, forgotten. Amnesia hits. One becomes clueless, deliberately throwing away the key to knowing itself.

As a strategy, ego creates a symbology, a logical or rational way of seeing and analysing things to ensure the mind stays trapped in the imaginary world. That level of the the symbolic only affirms the imaginary. It simply creates more karma and confusion. True symbology enables us to see through the illusions of imaginary reality that the conscious ego exists in. That conscious level of ego existence is no more than a prison or hell room, (some call it a red room and have fun here for a time). Yet the growing agony of limitations that the imaginary register create difficulty, forces one to play a character that one knows is not one real Self. One feels its an inauthentic being . This cripples the possibility of any lasting happiness and lasting relationships.

To know true happiness, the ego must be released to rediscover what is truly real. This differs from what has been accepted as real, conceptualized as such and then repressed. The act of meditation begins by dropping all concepts to offer a glimpse of truth. At first, this is dropping of imaginary concepts, then the eruptions of the real must be felt and dropped. This brings on the dark night of the soul. Then as all unconscious is recognized as unreal, and the shock of reality may feel like hitting rockbottom.

Despite this, the ultimate trauma for ego is real love. The love ego seeks is the love that reinforces its own illusory existence, that is, conditional love. The ego cannot become vulnerable enough to love deeply or know true intimacy. Ego can only express love as insatiable desire. The desire to be desired is simply the desire to be seen as an object, a body lusted after, used, possessed, defiled by the other. That kind of love is sought as a way to deal with other unbearable trauma. Of course, the awake being knows this is not real love. For it simply leads to more desire for illusory love to fill an emptiness that cannot be filled.

The only way to be free of this is to discover what true love is for oneself. Only through direct experience then does it dawn that you are more than a body. more than a mind, more than emotion. The love that comes from one's own heart is something the ego can never reach. The ego is too repressed to allow itself to be open. To find courage to enter the heart and rediscover love, we rediscover chakra 5, the ability to refute or dismantle the fantasies that have been destroying one's life and crippling one's capacities to manifest one's potential. Yet, once one has access to real love, the ego and power it exerts over consciousness, is dissolved. This fabrication was only meant to enable a helpless child to survive, not to be in charge of the adult body.

One continues to run from oneself, continues to fall into repressed infantile states, until one is ready to grow up, let go of dependency. This is about taking responsibility. We each have ability to self sabotage . As we recognize the ego's folly, nothing to fear. Demons are mental delusions, memory traces. Monsters we project are inviting us to lturn within, see the source of fear. So long as we choose to live in the past, we do not value or fully embody the real truth. Real Love leads one to the real Self.

Being centred is key

Notice if we are truly committed to soul growth, this requires we shift our full, conscious attention in this direction. Wherever we focus in this world creates problems or distrubance until we recall our true relationship to energy and all things. Yet, what is it to devote ourself to our evolving relationship with self?

Contrary to popular belief, evolution does not necessarily require living in solitude in a remote place, leaving a job or family, though such experiences may be part of our journey. In truth, evolution happens as we prioiritize our liberation from illusion, decide to be conscious of our reactions/ responses to all things. See triggers as gifts to move though them. If the external happens to irritate us, evoke fear, negativity, imbalance, we accept this points to what is going on inside us. If people are talking and it bothers us, then we realize disturbance is within us. This is taking responsibility for our thoughts and feelings and recognizing power is within to direct every moment of our lives.

A being intent on spiritual grow uses every moment for this purpose. Its not only during scheduled meditation or spiritual practice. To sense energy is to realize wherever we are, we attract or repulse everything in our experience. We tend to look past what feels neutral to what evokes pain or pleasure, want to minimize pain and maximize pleasure. We are disturbed, experience pleasure through attraction or overlook things. Ponder why so many things are neutral. Within those moments, a peaceful relationship exists. There is nothing to do abouti it. Thing is, balanced states tend not to last long. Our conditioned habit is to push things away or cling to things we attract to stay balanced. Whatever we are constantly working on is not us. Problems and solutions are not us. Yet they take most attention. The spiritual journey is about shifting away from that to neutrality.

Yoga is about turning all this upside down. It helps us realize that only working with ourselves can change our external conditions. It is not about touching our toes but what we learn about us through the course of our practice. As opposed to what is widely taught, we cannot change 'life' by focusing on the external. Why?

A closer look reveals focusing on the external is giving our power away. The external solves itself when we work on ourselves. Life is energy simply passing by and we are at peace with it. All of life is beautiful. If we think something right or wrong with life, then judgment is within us about us. People are the way they are. Situations are the way they are. We are honoured to be here with it all. There is a dance of energy unfolding. Watch what happens when there is no attempt to control things. Put whole heart and soul into whatever is before us. What enables us to experience life as it is not on what we define it to be. All of life exist to free us from our own self-created limitation and illusions.

So, work on our inner selves can happen every moment. Until we understand what takes us out of the peace evoked in meditation, then we will not be able to prolong that experience. Pay attention. Watch what is coming up in you. Join the dots. Ebbs and flows of inner tides prevent us from being at peace. True spiritual growth is the revelation that we are working on ourselves every moment of every day and not simply when we are meditating.

Most people can maintain consciousness and balance in a relaxed situation. The key is to be aware of what draws us out of that state. How do we stay centred, come what may? Shift focus inward to how we are responding to life, relationships, situations. Enter a room and participate in interactions, keep the continuity of experience and leave still centred. The purpose of any event is never the event, it is what happens to you when you are interacting before, during and after a situation and how we grow to remain calm and centred.

Do inner work, reap the benefits

Doing inner work on ourselves guides us to insights about the idea of God, the divine or sacred. The word is less important than the process of going iinward, feeling into what this is for yourself. What does it mean to grow personally? It implies you grow in maturity and awareness of issues you have inside of yourself: fears, desires, insecurities, needs, wants, self-consciousness, shame, embarassment, guilt, anger, resentment, the list goes on. These words refer to sample currents of energy unfolding within.

Consider the analogy of rocks creating disturbance or current in the flowing river. Simply removing individual obstacles to spirituality reveals the natural state of things. So why are we taught to make complicated what is simple? Obstacles we face are the roadmap to spiritual states of expanded consciousness. They are the pointers to a more peaceful existence, a completley new perception and vibrational sense of reality.

At the perfect moment, it dawns no recipe or technique exists to meet or get us to God or magically make us divine. Disturbances within invite us to see them as they are. This requires sheer honesty about what we are looking at and projecting into the external world. We have to be willing to see clearly. The path to liberation begins with our willingness to see the the nature of rocks which represent our own shadows.

We can evolve to look at ourselves objectively. This requires we rise above judement, complaint, self criticism. Changing our attitude about ourselves and what we see inwardly is a huge step to transforming our lives in ways that benefit Soul growth. To see the obstacles (garbage) within ourselves as they are is to reduce suffering around us. The bigger the obstacle we face, the more we reduce suffering.

Normally, those who are not awake are unaware of the nature of their thoughts and feelings and get lost in their emotions. They are unwilling to face truth, or take full responsibility for what they create. Rather than see what causes the disturbances in their lives, they may get stuck in survival mode, simply taking action the best they can to keep their head above water. IN order to get beyond this state, we must be willing to get out of the water, be the witness and see deeper into what is unfolding.

10 Ways to Take Responsibility for Your Life

Many people say they would like to change their lives or make positive changes but seem to encounter obstacles, complain, feel restless or postpone taking decisive action.  Now is the moment to be more pro-active.  Consider 10 ways to take greater responsibility for your life:

1. Prioritize Yourself

To take more control of life, deep down, we must feel worthy, deserving of good things, better decisions. Holding self-limiting beliefs, perpetuating negative self-talk ("I can't or won't...")  causes us to avoid responsibility.  Thus, we may feel undeserving of better. Thing is, we can only love and support others if we love and support self first, practice self-love and self-care.

2. Stop Blaming the External

Although common practice, blaming others for our conditions is a form of self-sabotage, an unconscious attempt to escape from growing up (maturing as a soul). Society teaches us to and judge others rather than address our own actions. When we are hyper-focused on other people’s behaviours, we often overlook signs and signals we give ourselves and available big life lessons.

3. Develop Self-Awareness

To take responsibility for our thoughts and actions, we must grow self-aware. Self-reflection allows us to deepen awareness.  To grow mindful of feelings, thoughts as they arise, helps us understand our actions,  patterns and reasons behind the things we do.

4. Be Accountable

Being responsible entails being accountable to yourself.  Some people love external praise and their own positive feelings and yet find it hard to realize they are the source of all their behaviour, perception, feelings, or results. Pride blocks growth.  To be accountable is to accept and understand our role in each situation.  How we are treated depends on how we treat ourselves. The key is self-honesty, not avoiding transparency. Of course, self-pity and guilt are not helpful.

5. Get to Know Yourself

Turns out, we are conditioned to adopt other people’s beliefs about us.  Beyond external conditioning, we all have our own sense of success and happiness.  Though family and peers may have good intentions, we cannot act to appease others and live in integrity.  If parents may want their child to look a certain way, choose a specific training, career, or partner. We would not blindly listen if we took steps to get to know self, our version of happiness and success. This requires self-honesty.  We may even need to separate from people who constantly impose their views.  This can create internal conflict, complicating our decision-making.

6. Love Yourself

Taking responsibility can be difficult until we love ourselves enough to get that every moment, we control our thoughts, feelings and life direction. Realizing this changes things.  When we judge ourselves harshly, we throw off our inner balance. We feel ungrounded, unsupported, unsustainable, and very discouraged. Self-love guides us to the wisdom within the self. A mere shift in perspective is a potent action in the name of love.

7. Eliminate Excuses

To make excuses is not responsible, like denying you are the captain of your ship. An irresponsible person may say they want to eat healthier but say they don’t have time. However, to be responsible, accountable, and honest, is to prioritize creating time. We can find many reasons not to make life changes.  Yet, this is giving our power away. We all have the same 24 hours per day. We are all responsible for how we choose to use it.

8. Remove Toxic People

Toxic people enable us to continue unhealthy habits and toxic behaviour. People who genuinely care for us and love us will hold you accountable.  They want to see us achieve our dreams. Other individuals want to keep us  co-dependent.  To take responsibility for life means taking responsibility for our entourage, and relationships. People who frequently complain, self-loathe, self-deprecate, and speak down on your progress do not benefit our growth.  Creating distance brings us inner strength. Nourish healthy and supportive interaction. Also, seek to establish emotional independence to make better decisions from an objective stance and attract authentic people into our life experience.

9. Eradicate Negative Self-Talk

Negative self-talk can arise from childhood trauma inflicted by abuse or bullying. These negative, self-limiting beliefs we have of ourselves usually originate from the projections and judgments other people throw at us. When we are younger, we tend to internalize these words, and they become ingrained. It takes time to un-condition such negative ideas about Self. However, it’s possible by doing activities aimed at self-love and self-care. We come into this world with a very clean slate.  As we grow, we begin to take on our personality. Much of this has to do with the environments. However, we can take responsibility for our lives and reclaim our full potential.

10.  Take Quantum Leaps outside Comfort Zones

The only way to truly take full and complete responsibility for our lives is to rediscover what it is to experience examples of fearlessness. This may begin in a playground swing,  allowing ourselves to fear the wind in our hair as we pump the swing higher.  As we gain courage and confidence, we increasingly make choices to do what we have not done before, confront our fears and see where assertiveness and adventurousness take us.  This may guide us to new job, new relationships, new entourage, new pastimes and ways to spend out time.  Remind yourself the five people you spend the most time with are the five people you are becoming.

Reclaim forgotten power

Notice each of us is the authority in our own version of reality yet for varied reasons, tend to forget this and give our power away. Let this moment be a turning point. Its up to each of us to take responsibility to move our lives forward, to grow aware of and let go of what no longer serves our highest good and the good of all. Reclaiming inner power can involve starting to see ourselves as the beautiful, strong, bold, and courageous beings we are created to be, putting heartfelt knowing into action. Reclaiming power also happens each instance we choose to forgive and love what we are taught to fear or hate so we can move on and it no longer controls us. Blossoming into more of true divine nature is about growing in wisdom and maturity to decode the signs and signals we give ourselves. Love the journey.